This Sunday morning we went to Wendy's along buendia near the LRT station where we met up with a couple of more people namely Boj and another one, someone who I refuse to name in this blog. Hmph!
After having our much awaited orders served and gobbled up, I suggested we take an out of town trip and go to tagaytay. There was a little discussion about it, we ended up having to gang up on Clint since he said he couldn't go, he was using his newly bought puppy as an excuse but alas! Josh's dramatic antics worked and we ended up going to tagaytay as planned.
A scene from The Petron Gas station along Macapagal Blvd:
After pulling over his Blue Mitsubishi Pajero, Josh asked for the gas money, Clint and I obliged and shared 500 bucks each.
Josh talking to the Gas boy, "Manong, palagay naman ng water sa radiator".
(Imagine that said in a very Kolehiyala manner)
The Gas boy said, "O sige po, sir" making tango his head with matching bewildered look on his face.
I can only imagine what he (the gas boy) was thinking when everyone started laughing out loud after I voiced out how I liked Josh's catchy line, "I like it! it's so kolehiyala!"
Josh our designated driver was more comfortable taking the cavite route to tagaytay and so after about an hour or so driving through the coastal road and through las pinas, we got into some kind of conversation, comparing guys we've met at the bar, of course, Ron was giving us a rundown of things we should know about the people who hung out there, I mean it's the usual conversation about other people amongst us friends.
Since I like long drives and it was my first time to take this route, I was sort of enjoying the scenery outside when I noticed Pio and Ron getting into some juicy details of something or someone, not really knowing what it was about I ended up asking Ron to start over.
Scene from inside Josh's car while driving to tagaytay:
(right before the accident)
I said "Ano yun? sige na beh, ulitin mo na"
Ron was saying "Nakakahiya, but he told me "I want you to chever on my face!"
I couldn't believe what I heard, apparently, I wasn't the only one.
The two ladies in front heard it as well and was as surprised as I was.
In fact Josh was so surprised he had to take his eyes off the road and look at Ron and that's when we crashed into the white pajero right in front of us. We were lucky that our ride was sort of sturdy because the impact was kind of strong.
Ron ended up being "tulala" for a moment.
Pio claimed he didn't hear anything when we crashed when in fact he was shrieking when it happened which was probably why he didn't hear anyone else.
I went down the car to assist Josh with the situation and while talking to owner of the car we hit, I hadn't noticed that everyone else went down to give support, Ron wearing his "baby red" colored shirt (color terminology coined by Pio) was smiling sweetly to the car owner. Clint being his mataray self, Me trying not to mind a headache, which i forget to tell why I had one. I hit my face on the back of the drivers seat during the crash. Pio, on the other hand was really just wanting to smoke to vent out the tension. It was our lucky day though, the guy's also from las pinas where Josh lives and not only that, he was sort of the ex-boss of his older sister.
Everyone got back in the car, talking all at the same time about what happened and our individual experiences of it, I don't really remember but someone started making fun of how Josh, again, was so arte about the way he said something about stepping on the breaks. I mean it was a lame excuse but executed that way? I guess it never fails to work. Haha! During this whole drama, we somehow ended up blaming it all on Pio, him being the "malas" person in the group, a conclusion that was backed by a previous car accident involving Josh's car and a passenger jeep where in Pio and Clint were on the passenger seats. We also agreed on writing a note to LTO about things gay men need not mention while driving.
Trying to get away from the wake of the White Pajero/ Blue Pajero car crash. We decided that our first stop was gonna be Starbucks, we all needed caffeine to wake our senses up but even before we actually had our coffee, we already had some stimulation (Visual at least) from a group of foreign looking guys riding a black mercedes benz which parked right beside us. We ended up waiting for Ron ouside starbucks since he decided to take his time changing his shirt to a black one and ultimately taking the chance to flirt with 'em foreign looking boys.
After getting our drinks, we hung out at the upper outside floor and decided to make the most of the sunday morning sun, and so it's camwhoring time! we took some pictures, commented on how nice the weather is, laughed and talked about a lot of things that I barely remember.
An hour or so has passed and we decided to have brunch at Leslie's where we spent most of our time. There we ended up talking about a lot of things and ended up daydreaming about this one fine looking fella wearing red shorts, gray shirt and a beanie, apparently an amboy, How did I know? well, Ron chanced upon this fella in the wash room and he was talking slang or something to that effect.
Excerpts from the "Leslie's Conversations" :
While talking about the what ifs of our lives, which by the way was promulgated by a question that Josh threw at us out of the blue.
Josh commenting on Leslie's: This is such a nice date place right?
Everyone: Yeah...
Ron: Beh! (Clapping his hands) You're the one to beat in this competition!
Josh: Would you walk and take a shower under the rain if a guy asks you to?
Eems, Ron, Clint and Pio: What do you mean? Hahaha!
The conversations went into having your dream guy have halitosis or gingivitis and or being a macho dancer and or having crooked teeth and a smaller or larger than imaginable nether regions, even having weird fetishes, I mean we've made up all the possible ways where you may have to end up on giving up that dream person. Oh by the way Pio kept on asking if it was like Gabby Concepcion, Yeees! dream guy nga eh.
How about those situation's we've come up with? Like the sweetest things, the worst case scenarios like you and a friend liking the same person, Eherm! Pio, we both know what our answers are but I don't remember about the others saying anything or commenting, Hahaha!
We were having fun and we didn't care. Not even with the disgusted looks on the other peoples faces. We were having fun and "please don't stop the music" is playing on the background. It was perfect.
I guess all five of us will agree when I say that the most unforgettable part of our trip was when Ron said his movie-worthy line.
Ron Tan: "I can never afford to kiss a panget person."
All together now.
Like Oh my God! You're so arte!!!
Cast of Characters:
(in no particular order)
Josh: The Traditionalist
Clint: The Conservative
Eems: The Skank
Pio: The Whore
Ron: The Slut
All with monastic upbringing... :P
I’m officially jobless. It’s only been two weeks and it already feels like forever, it’s probably because of how fast I lost my job or maybe because I miss the stressing over my work drama-of-it-all, after all, I’ve been doing this kind of work for more than three years. It's my bread and butter and it became as precious as the air I breathe. I was severed all too sudden and felt like going cold turkey.
A friend aptly referred to our generation as stress junkies and I can’t help but nod in agreement. I was saying that I finally have all the time to do what I wanted, but all the time I had in my hands were starting to bore me since I didn’t really have anything better to do with it, I was just home doing either of three things: sleeping, eating and watching TV, quite literally getting my ass bigger. I’m non-productive and lazy as ever. I’m pretty much a slob in the making and the stormy/gloomy weather is not at all helping with the mood, but I’m grateful to find something else to blame for my general unwillingness to function properly, which, by the way is hardly there to begin with.
This friend pointed out that we are so addicted to all the stress that we get stressed when we’re not stressed, get what I mean? I know it’s twisted but oddly we thrive in it like mosquitoes in stagnant waters, we obviously hate it but not to the point where we're going to do what's necessary to change, we even get agitated without it, and so I wonder whether it’s the same for people who didn’t work in the call-center industry, after all their really not dealing with having to change shifts every now and then and having to work during the time you’re supposed to be sleeping or as a friend said “taking everyone else’s crap everyday when you can’t even deal with your own.” The amount of physical and emotional stress we have to deal with is somewhat doubled because of the culture of the industry. Yes it is hard, a lot harder than it seems. I thought it was just an itch that you can scratch; apparently it’s deeper than that.
This kind of behavior is alarmingly higher than usual, although It’s merely a pattern for most us because of the weather changes and how our stars are aligned. I've never heard more people getting depressed, feeling less optimistic and a whole lot losing interest in what they really want to do in the same regularity of our monthly bills, generally this is disheartening, especially for a country who supposedly ranks number 17 in the happiest country on earth.
Somehow the dreams have become impossible to achieve, financial stability is after all what most of us prioritize. Some of us are probably just putting it off until we get the chance or the courage to get on with it, some are waiting for their big-break while they toil their way up the corporate ladder, however, the majority of us plainly find it impractical to pursue because of how hard life already is. No matter what reason we have, the amount of stress we put ourselves into and the lifestyles we lead will one day catch up on us and then it's payback time. So let’s admit it; whether we like it or not, we really are a bunch of stress/drama junkies and we love the rough and tumble of the harried lives we live.
I’m officially jobless. It’s only been two weeks and it already feels like forever, it’s probably because of how fast I lost my job or maybe because I miss the stressing over my work drama-of-it-all, after all, I’ve been doing this kind of work for more than three years. It's my bread and butter and it became as precious as the air I breathe. I was severed all too sudden and felt like going cold turkey.
A friend aptly referred to our generation as stress junkies and I can’t help but nod in agreement. I was saying that I finally have all the time to do what I wanted, but all the time I had in my hands were starting to bore me since I didn’t really have anything better to do with it, I was just home doing either of three things: sleeping, eating and watching TV, quite literally getting my ass bigger. I’m non-productive and lazy as ever. I’m pretty much a slob in the making and the stormy/gloomy weather is not at all helping with the mood, but I’m grateful to find something else to blame for my general unwillingness to function properly, which, by the way is hardly there to begin with.
This friend pointed out that we are so addicted to all the stress that we get stressed when we’re not stressed, get what I mean? I know it’s twisted but oddly we thrive in it like mosquitoes in stagnant waters, we obviously hate it but not to the point where we're going to do what's necessary to change, we even get agitated without it, and so I wonder whether it’s the same for people who didn’t work in the call-center industry, after all their really not dealing with having to change shifts every now and then and having to work during the time you’re supposed to be sleeping or as a friend said “taking everyone else’s crap everyday when you can’t even deal with your own.” The amount of physical and emotional stress we have to deal with is somewhat doubled because of the culture of the industry. Yes it is hard, a lot harder than it seems. I thought it was just an itch that you can scratch; apparently it’s deeper than that.
This kind of behavior is alarmingly higher than usual, although It’s merely a pattern for most us because of the weather changes and how our stars are aligned. I've never heard more people getting depressed, feeling less optimistic and a whole lot losing interest in what they really want to do in the same regularity of our monthly bills, generally this is disheartening, especially for a country who supposedly ranks number 17 in the happiest country on earth.
Somehow the dreams have become impossible to achieve, financial stability is after all what most of us prioritize. Some of us are probably just putting it off until we get the chance or the courage to get on with it, some are waiting for their big-break while they toil their way up the corporate ladder, however, the majority of us plainly find it impractical to pursue because of how hard life already is. No matter what reason we have, the amount of stress we put ourselves into and the lifestyles we lead will one day catch up on us and then it's payback time. So let’s admit it; whether we like it or not, we really are a bunch of stress/drama junkies and we love the rough and tumble of the harried lives we live.
I watched the premiere of Sweeney Todd with Anj and Cesca today, I was moody as usual, hahaha! I even heard Anj comment on my "kasungitan" but I didn't react anymore, there was no need since it was true anyway. I guess the reason behind is that I felt bad going out without money in my pocket, I wanted to enjoy the moment but my mind was somewhere else, thinking of things I needed to take care of and trying to plot out my action plans for survival in the next couple of weeks, and so once again it's proven that I haven't really conquered on being worrisome.*sigh*
I've been wanting to go out though, I haven't gone out in a while and I'm starting to get bored of myself plus the fact that Anj's invitation was exactly the break I was looking for, so I wasn't about to let it pass.
Sadly though it didn't quite turn out to be as "fun" as I expected. No offense to anyone but that's just how I felt and it probably has something to do with being all worrisome or probably just plain lack of sleep, hence, the cranky Eems resurfaces.
Yes i'm moody or "grouchy" like a friend avidly calls me, but what can I do right? Last I checked I'm not exactly living in Pleasantville.
***disclaimer, although i did not enjoy myself, i enjoyed the company of my friends and tremendously enjoyed the movie!***
*pic taken in coffee bean and tea leaf in greenbelt 3 ayala center, makati city - snapped with my long lost moto razr v3i***sobs***, hands, pen, notebook and shuffle by anj.
***posted 03.02.2007
25 years of my life and I barely remember the times when I felt complete and fine just being me. I mean I always try to remember it, somehow it's lost in the back of my head or probably gone with all the booze i've drank and cigs i've lit up. I'm a half-life, the kind of person who survives looking for what's missing in his life, a half waiting to be a whole... like that never ending quest to find true and eternal happiness and the painstaking process of being in love and getting hurt and of moving on and letting go, *** buses and trains mom! buses and trains!*** melodramatic but it's all true honey.
I wrote this once, In my endless search of what seems to be the unknowns a failure, for what I thought the unknown's my purpose, stupid I was I never found my soul. Quite profound huh? well, that's how I am when I get all depressed. I tend to think that i'm forever lost in the dark inescapable labyrinth we call life.
You know what though? I miss it a lot when I knew what I wanted to do, when I was so full of energy and life that one would think I'm all set to conquer the world. I miss it when I dreamt of being big and being someone great and I miss it most when I was me, when I was sure of what I want and when I was sure of myself. The harshness of the real world has robbed me of what's left of my hopes, dreams and passion and more recently I've come to realize that I've reached the point that I'm numbed by the overwhelming number of problems that has come my way. Can you just imagine that?! I mean the poeple who know me can attest that I'm always kinda dramatic but it's all happening at the same time and I've lost all will to go drama. I still find it pretty intense, a little too intense actually.
Try to look at it this way, put yourself in my shoes and you'll probably get an idea of why I'm like this, I'm single and I'm gay, so you can just go figure out how hard it can be for me... ALWAYS CAUGHT IN BETWEEN...***sigh*** I share the same emotions with about a hand full of people I know and it transcends gender, age and social background... there are those who take it a little too seriously and there are those who just doesn't give a shit, I wish I was the later but that's just wishful thinking.
My mom told me once that God sometimes breaks our spirits to save our soul, breaks our hearts to make us whole, pain is given so we can be stronger and sometimes sends us to failure to become humble, ultimately He sometimes takes everything away from us so that we learn the value of everything He gave us.
It's not hard to believe that this has some truth to it because it happens to us day in and day out, the harshness of reality sometimes bites when we least expect it, that's what sucks about it. We can only do our best and being Pinoy we have that natural resiliency and optimism which helps us all recover from the bruises of being left behind, let's admit it though, we sometimes can't help but deny the truth and pretend that we've moved on with our lives, we say we've accepted what happened but we only end up spending precious time in fear of being hurt again. Precious time that should've been spent on more important matters. We forget that what's important is that we keep these peoples memories alive in our hearts and continue on living in the today and not the shadow of the past. I know it's easy to say but it beats the hell out of sulking in your room and being all dramatic about life right?
So what's my point then? Well, lets just say that whatever pulls us through all of this is something we are all capable of. We may not fully understand why it happens but isn't it comfort enough knowing that there are a lot of things in store for us in the future? I might never get to fully grasp what it actually means to move on or let go, but I always keep in mind that the only thing constant in this world is change and all of the human race go through it.
All I can really say is that we somehow make it through because we find our saving grace, be it in our hearts or other peoples', maybe in the little things that happens to us every day, like the simple smile of a stranger or the mere hello or text message, or a hug from a friend. I found mine in the most unlikely place and in the most unlikely situation, who knows yours might just be under your nose, picking on you and bitching you around.
***posted 12.06.2006
